I cant believe I missed this when it came out but am happy to have read it now. Tara does not dilute the family ways and experiences. I found it hard to believe she did not realize her family was not normal but that is because I did not grow up completely indoctrinated from birth with little access to other opinions. I often had to remind myself of this. But because I did, It helped me to understand how her feelings and emotions were constantly at war. The influence of family cannot ever be discounted.